thoughts.

warming as it ran down his throat, he put the glass back down on the table again. his mind was full of thoughts, thoughts about abandonment, imagined, real and to come. he felt like his thoughts spilled into the air around him. shaking his head, as if to dislodge them, he took another drag of his cigarette. he really shouldn't be smoking, nor should he be drinking. by by happenstance both vodka and smokes had been there. he'd been told ealier that day that all his dreams and plans might really be escapism, a way for him to avoid thinking of his problems. another drag and another swig. despite experiences, both helped him to clear his head. at least tonight.

escapism might be what he had become all about lately. truly he wanted nothing else but be able to escape... everything. his life, the people around him, the people further away, the city, even this day and age. he wanted so badly to leave it all behind and start anew. start anew somewhere else. somewhere he could be himself all the time, support himself, live day to day, with just the care of how to support himself further. cut all bonds.

all of these thoughts conflicted with much of his being. he loved most of the people surrounding him. he had been able to cut off most of the people who were cause of grief. he had a loving family, friends and above all a girl who he really loved. but somehow, tonight, they had all become second. second to him.

it was all normal, he guessed, that he should wound up feeling like this. again. as he leaned back, eyes half-closed, the scent of distilled alcohol in his nostrils, mouth and lungs filling with sweet-tasting round smoke, he imagined himself in a desert, far away from everyone and everything. blue sky above, horizon dotted with a few white could, the ground yellow, with streaks of red sand.
he imagined himself standing there, in the middle of a barren creation, arms spread, as he suddenly felt a tingling. the already thick air, suddenly getting thicker, electric almost. opening his eyes, looking upwards, he was a ring of clouds. surrounding him on all sides, pressing in. at last the thick dark gray rolling clouds covered even the last bit of the blue sky. and the rain began to pour. almost silent at first, then soon with a roar eradicating every other possible sound. he felt elated, he felt free. he began to laugh loudly - the sounds drowned in the falling water.

he opened his eyes again, shook his head. he couldnt even keep his mind in the room with him anymore. downing the last of the warming liquid, putting out the smoke, he ventured in search of sleep.

Memes be flammable truths!

Below is an excerpt from an article written by BBC's Pauk Mason. You should really read the whole article, it's well-written, unlike my random scribles, and a really good read!

20 reasons why its kicking

1. At the heart if it all is a new sociological type: the graduate with no future

2. ...with access to social media, such as Facebook, Twitter and eg Yfrog so they can express themselves in a variety of situations ranging from parliamentary democracy to tyrrany.

3. Therefore truth moves faster than lies, and propaganda becomes flammable.

why you shouldn't...

- befriend your old girlfriends on facebook. they're most likely doing whatever they always dreamed of doing, whereas you are sitting on front of your computer, back hurting, scrolling through their facebook-page.

- bring your phone with you on the binge after you've gotten dumped. she'll be deleting every single text you send, so will her mother, sister and best friend - leaving you a bigger and more complete bastard.

- eat while you watch porn. i wont even answer that.

I bet you didn't know that about me!

There's a lot of things you probably don't know about me, you've probably picked up on the fact that I'm addicted to coffee, but do you know how I drink it? Do you know my favourite author? Probably not. But I've decided to let you in on a little secret of mine.

I'm crazy about Lady Gaga. *gasp*

Okay - that's not really a secret for those who know me. But you probably didn't know it :p

On another note. We got sent home from school today because of a bombthreat, and now the whole area is swarming with cops. Oh - and I live about 100 meters from the school.